Mother's Day 2019

I’ve started this Mother’s Day blog so many times and if I am honest I feel lost on what to say really.
Whilst Mother’s Day is important to me it also makes me sad. I just feel like there is so much pressure on who has the best day, who got the best gift, who had breakfast in bed, who got treated the most. Why is it that instead of celebrating Mother’s Day and just being in the moment that instead it feels more like a competition?
It’s no surprise that since I lost Ethan, I have found Mother’s Day hard. My first Mother’s Day as a Mummy when I was pregnant with Ethan, we told our parents I was pregnant, so it was all very nice and exciting. A year later I was visiting his grave instead and pregnant with our rainbow Alfie wondering if we got to keep this baby. Since then I feel like I have been caught up in what I’m meant to do, what’s expected of me. Along with social media showing us what everyone is doing and seeing these people that spend all day being spoilt, rather than enjoying it, I just end up feeling sad, like my day wasn’t good enough. Which then makes me sound ungrateful but that’s not what I mean. What I mean is social media makes us feel like we should live up to certain expectations. Social media just feels so fake, a fake view on what we should do say act, but and how to be on those special days. In truth, whatever I actually do on Mother’s Day and whatever I get I absolutely love them because it has come from a place of love. (Hopefully this came out right!)
This past twelve months has been a struggle, thanks to this illness I have. It’s taken so much away from me. As I said in my recent blog ‘who am I’ I’ve lost who I am and I honestly don’t really know what I want now when it comes to Mother’s Day. All I know is that I feel like I want to celebrate the fact that I did a flipping good job at managing to get through this year whilst being so poorly!
Being a Mum is hard at the best of times, we all have our struggles if we show it or not it’s still there.
People don’t say much about the hard parts of being a Mum. So let’s share the good, the bad, the ugly and no matter what just support each other.
I’m hoping to be having a nice relaxing hot shower today, with hot brews. I’m hoping not to be in charge of a tiny human wild child toddler aka Alfie. I’m hoping for all three meals cooked for me and for me not to do any washing up!
Being a Mum is hard. It’s hard being an angel Mum. It’s hard being a rainbow Mummy and it’s hard being a Step Mum.
So let’s embrace the fact that we did our best this past year, we got by, we stuck together, shared advise and our kids still love us.
Let’s embrace this day and enjoy, let’s not make each other feel bad on what we did or didn’t get, let’s not show off, let’s just have a good day, whatever works for us and be happy.
Much love
Emma xx

Pictures are from last year’s Mother’s Day (2018)

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